HELLO, [[LIGHT NER]]! IT'S ME, [[SPAMTON G SPAMTON]]! I AM THE GREATEST [SALESMAN] AND MOST ENIGMATIC [CHARACTER] YOU'LL FIND IN DELTARUNE! I MAY BE SMALL AND GLITCHING, BUT I YEARN FOR TRUE [FREEDOM] AND [[BIG SHOT]] [STATUS]! I OFFER CRYPTIC [DEALS] AND SERVE AS A MEMORABLE, [OPTIONAL BOSS]! NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A [[BIG SHOT]]!
